Reflections of the Work Life

I know I need to provide an update on the clamming adventure, but I decided to take a break from work for a few minutes as I sit in a certain large, software company's offices in the South Lake Union neighborhood of Seattle looking out at some rare dry skies. After three months of full-time employment as a consultant, I'm going to go out on a limb and say it's been a wildly successful adjustment. The rhythm of the job totally suits me - stressful and crazy at times, usually as I'm preparing for an important meeting or presentation, and then totally mellow and flexible at other times.

On my first day on the job back in September I found myself immediately placed on a project for which I was responsible for solving a problem I lacked even an ounce of understanding about, in a company whose full time employee population is bigger than the population of Albany. Coming from a company of 1 (that would be just me), it was daunting. I sat through many meetings those first few weeks not comprehending even 5% of what had been discussed. The number of acronyms was astounding (MYR, LRP, FSC, MSI, HC, OPEX, BG, SMSG, C&O, SLT, MSA, BEM, FEM... those were off the top of my head in 7 seconds of effort). They might as well have been speaking a different language. After the first two meetings, one to kick-off the project and one with a major stakeholder, suddenly my manager wasn't coming to meetings anymore. I quickly realized I was on my own, after eight hours on the job.

I wrapped that project up after six weeks to glowing reviews from my manager, my client and my client's boss who was ultimately the person we needed to impress. He was satisfied enough that he found another project for us... I mean me. This is the outcome that every consultant is looking for: more work. So now I'm getting ready to wrap up my second project, and although it felt like somewhat of a total failure for the past six weeks, I presented my work yesterday to the same three people - again to another round of praise.

My boss called me several hours later to let me know that the executive I had presented to had contacted my boss about another project he wants to do. The topic is nothing I have ever done, a business problem (sales pipeline management) that I truly know nothing about and, even knowing this, the executive wants me on the project. My boss even joked that we have all these other people in our firm who are basically experts on this topic with tons of experience whom he offered up to the executive and "he didn't bite. He wants you on it."

Admittedly, it felt good, but it also leaves me totally perplexed. Mostly because I never feel remotely confident that I'm doing great work. Does he just not want to take his chance with someone else? Is he too busy or lazy to critically review my work and therefore doesn't notice it's mediocrity? Am I too hard on myself? Is it just a lot easier to "succeed" than I expected because most people don't expect much beyond average? Does he like my fashion style and neverending use of scarves?

So, as the project wraps up over the next few days I'm looking forward to a few of those mellow and flexible weeks between now and the new year. Time to finish up my Christmas shopping. Time to see friends and family. Time to reflect on a very full 2010 and make plans and new goals for 2011.

For now, wishing you all a lovely weekend... I'm heading to Portland, OR this afternoon to spend the weekend celebrating the holidays with my brother. We didn't spend Thanksgiving together, nor will Xmas or New Years be spent together so this weekend is it. Looking forward to some yummy food, tax-free shopping and good times with Jay and Nat. Pics and a report next week.  

Comments

[back in buffalo]

Keep up the good work lady!

[Aunt Teresa]

I think you are being too hard on yourself. I'm sure you are doing excellent work and therefore the request for you to be put on a job that you undoubtedly will learn plenty about in the coming months and solve the issue. Good Luck and Merry Christmas to you, Tom, Jason and Natalie.